Tag Archives: “Star Wars” news

Yoda vs. Yoda in “The Phantom Menace”

OK, hold on a minute, I might have to reverse my decision on one of George Lucas’ “tweaks” to the “Star Wars” films for their Blu-Ray debut. I actually think the new CGI Yoda in “The Phantom Menace” is a huge improvement over the dead-eyed, Cracked-out Yoda puppet that originally appeared in the film. I mean, seriously, what is wrong with that f-ing puppet, man? Yikes…he musta scared the freaking midi-chlorians outta little Anakin!

So, you win this round, Mr. Lucas, but, I still ain’t buying all those damn Blu-Rays till they go on sale. Or, you know, someone like my talented and lovely wife gifts them to me for Christmas…

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Holy blinking Ewoks, Mr. Lucas!

I’m sure you’ve heard the news by now, but, for those of you who haven’t, George Lucas has once again riled up the “Star Wars” faithful by making a handful of incredibly nerdy, holy unnecessary changes to the “Star Wars” movies for their upcoming Blu-Ray debut. And yes, blinking Ewoks is one of them.

Oh, you didn’t notice that the Ewoks in “Return of the Jedi” didn’t have eyelids? Well, neither did I. And neither did the rest of the flipping world, but, something tells me those un-blinking Ewoks kept Lucas awake many a night for the past twenty-something years. How else to explain that and the rest of the completely ridiculous changes he’s made to the sci-fi classics? Oy, seriously, somebody get this man a hobby already…

To see a full list of the absurdities about to be unleashed on Blu-Ray, click here, And in the meantime, I’ll be watching my beloved, un-butchered, un-special-edition Original Theatrical Release version DVD’s of the original series.

They might not look as crisp as the Blu-Ray versions of the films, but any world where Han Solo still shoots first and those loathsome little Ewoks have dry, itchy eyes, is cool with me!

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“Star Wars: The Complete Saga” coming to Blu-Ray this fall!

Even if you didn’t have a ticket to CES last week, self-respecting “Star Wars” fans everywhere felt a powerful disturbance in the Force when it was announced on Thursday that the “Star Wars” saga is finally coming to Blu-Ray Disc this September. Whoo-hoo, thank the maker!

No official street date has been announced, but, you can pre-order your “Star Wars” saga three different ways this time out.

Old School: in a set containing only the original three films and all the extras, New School: the Prequel Films only, with all the extras, or, you can go whole hog and get the Complete Collection of all six films in one big old boxed set for somewhere around $139.99. Hmmm…guess which one I have my eye on?

I think the only bad news for hard-core fans is that we’ll have to buy the full set of “Star Wars” movies…again! I mean, shit, if you count Videodisc, VHS widescreen and full-frame, Laserdisc and DVD, I’ve bought these same damn movies like, five times over. But, hey, who’s counting?

If the rad-ass new trailer (above) is any indication, the Blu-Ray editions are gonna rock, so, start saving your Republic Credits now, baby! Yee-haw!

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Founder of Jedi Church banned from store for wearing hood!

Just when we thought religious discrimination was a thing of the past, the UK press is reporting that one of the founders of the International Church of Jediism, Daniel Morgan Jones (23), was forcibly ejected from a Tesco supermarket in North Wales for refusing to remove his hood — which he wears at all time for religious reasons — while shopping.

Emperor Palpatine shopping at Vons #1

According to Jones, who also goes by his Jedi name, Morda Hehol, the Jedi doctrine explicitly states that a Jedi Knight “must wear a hood up in any public place of a large audience.” I don’t know how large the “audience” was at that grocery store, but Jones claims that Tesco security violated his “religious rights” by asking him to remove his hood.

Making matters even worse was the fact that a Muslim woman in a veil was allowed to shop freely while Jones was shown the door. “I walked past a Muslim lady in a veil…surely the same rules should apply to everyone” Jones griped later.

Still reeling from the experience, Jones is considering legal action, but in the meantime advises other UK Jedi to boycott Tesco stores, hoping to make the grocery chain “feel the Force“. OMG, so awesome!

Emperor Palpatine shopping at Vons #2

Emperor Palpatine shopping at Vons #3

But the real kicker here was the reaction from Tesco’s corporate office. Responding to the Jedi dust up this afternoon, Tesco released a statement saying, and I quote: “He hasn’t been banned. Jedis are very welcome to shop in our stores although we would ask them to remove their hoods. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda and Luke Skywalker all appeared hoodless without ever going over to the Dark Side and we are only aware of the Emperor as one who never removed his hood.” Ooo, snap! Take that Morda Hehol!

Funnier still was Tesco’s closing statement: “If Jedi walk around our stores with their hoods on, they’ll miss lots of special offers.” Ha! Hilarious! Break out my Anakin costume, sweetie, we’re going to Tesco!

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