Holy crap! Did anyone else watch this televised insanity last night? Man, if my Mother-in-Law hadn’t strong-armed us into watching part one of the season finale of “Dancing with the Stars” — a show neither Christine or I have ever watched willingly — we would probably have missed it entirely.
But, thanks to Marge, we totally watched the premiere episode of “Skating with the Stars” and, Lord in heaven, I want my hour back.
Seriously, that shit was so crazy! No offense to the sexiest damn replicant in the “Blade Runner” universe, but, when Sean Young is your biggest name star, you know you don’t have any stars. Yikes! And the still-sexy Miss Young tried her damndest, but, wow, bitch could not skate to save her life!
Even Olympic Gold Medalist Jonny Mosely sucked. Sure, he won his gold for skiing, but, still, you’d think he’d have some basic skating skills. Sadly, he didn’t.
The rest of the nobody’s…ahem…”stars”, were fine-to-decent skaters — except for reality show super-bitch Bethenny Frankel, who kinda rocked! — but the highlight of the night was when middle judge and resident super freak, Johnny Weir, inexplicably skated for the crowd.
It was so weird, they just came back from the break and announced that now, Johnny Weir would be skating. Huh? What about the next couple? And how did Johnny change into that strange outfit and frost his tips red so quickly? It was very confusing, amigos.
And the song the Weird One skated to? Wait for it…Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face”. Ha! Perfection! Instantly, the show went from plain-old bad TV to totally-surreal Mexican variety show. So awesomely bad! Wow…it’s almost enough to make me wanna watch next week. Almost…
Anybody else watch this craziness? If so, what’d you think?