Farrah Fawcett (1947-2009)

Anyone who watched that crazy-sad documentary “Farrah’s Story” a few weeks back knew that this day was totally coming, but, wow, who knew it would come so quickly? And Christine and I had no idea it would move us like it did. I mean, we were sad and totally shocked about Michael Jackson, but, Farrah’s passing made us both cry like babies.

I guess it might be the cancer angle, or maybe just watching her fight so bravely in the face of completely shitty odds, but for whatever reason, the death of Farrah Fawcett hit us both really hard. Sure, she was crazy sometimes — that boozy meltdown with David Letterman in 1997 comes to mind — but for anyone who grew up in the 1970’s, Farrah was the 70’s. I mean, seriously, who didn’t love that woman back in the day?

One season on “Charlie’s Angels” and that awesome, nipple-tastic poster above would have been enough for some women, but not Farrah. Fawcett showed she could really act in hard-hitting, award-worthy movies like “The Burning Bed”, “Extremeties” and “The Apostle” and, hell, even her bad movies kinda rocked. I mean, hello, my brother and I did not run to the theatre to see “Logan’s Run” for Michael York.

And even though I have yet to sit through it, I must admit I’ve always been curious about that legendary robot rape scene with Farrah in the epically-bad “Saturn 3”. Yes, amigos, the villainous robot apparently attempts to rape Farrah at one point. Don’t know if it happened onscreen or not, but I do know that was a key selling point when the film came out. And we were totally buying…but, well, it was rated R, and we were way too young pass for 17…so, we never saw it.

But even crazy misfires like “Saturn 3” prove that Farrah’s appeal was kinda bulletproof. She wasn’t just easy on the eyes, but she was funny, smart, opinionated and one of the most interesting and one-of-a-kind badasses to ever rock the pop culture spectrum.

So, for that and so much more, we salute you Farrah Fawcett. Your humor, your strength, your style and most of all, your rocking hair, will live on forever. Vaya con Dios, angelita de Carlos…you will be sorely missed.

Bettie Page (1923-2008)

You’ve probably already heard the news by now, but, after being hospitalized earlier this week with pneumonia, 1950’s pin-up queen Bettie Page died yesterday in Los Angeles at the age of 85. Now, I’m not the world’s foremost authority on Miss Bettie Page, but all I know is that every cool girl at Harbor High School wanted to be her and every dude I knew wanted to, well, let’s just say “date” her.

Though she gave up her modeling and acting career in the late fifties, Page’s ginormous resurgence in the 1980’s coincided with my teenage years and let me tell ya, she made a huge impact on me and my brother. Aside from her obvious physical “gifts”, the thing we really dug about Page is that she was so freaking “girl next door” cute.

Even in her most lurid bondage pics Page had that cutie pie smile that told you she was in on the joke and that as soon as she finished spanking or whipping her playmate on the couch she was gonna cook you up a mean meatloaf or something. And best of all, Page was a real woman, with real curves, who looked like she enjoyed the car-hop window at Bob’s Big Boy almost as much as I do. Seriously…how could I not love the woman?

Like I said above, I don’t know much about Page’s personal life — and no, I haven’t seen that “Notorious Bettie Page” biopic, but that’s mostly because I can only stomach Gretchen Mol in very small doses — so, maybe Page’s life off-camera was a train wreck. But based on her iconic pics, I gotta say, the lady had it going on, big time.

And if I had a nickel for every hip, rockabilly chick in high school and college who stole Bettie’s style, well, shit, I’d have a lot of frigging nickels. Simply put, if Greta Garbo was “The Face” of the 20th Century, then you can bet your ass that good old, cornfed Bettie Page was “The Bod”.

Rest in peace, Bettie Page, we’ll miss you…