Tag Archives: bad candy

Stride Shift Berry + Mint Gum

Normally, I would hate to follow a bad review with another one, but, this latest salvo in the Stride Gum Revolution was so bad that I simply had to warn you away from it. Yes, I know, the commercials are kinda cute and gum that changes flavor as you chew it does sound like a Wonkatastic idea. But, trust me, amigos, Stride Shift Berry + Mint gum is just plain horrific.

Being the cheap-ass that I am, I waited until their was a two-for-one coupon in the newspaper and the minute it came, I cut that baby out and practically ran to Vons to get me some Stride Shift. Now, before I go any further, I should tell you that the other flavor we sampled was the Citrus + Mint, which was only mildly repulsive…but that Berry + Mint? Wow, what a disaster!

At first blush though, everything seemed cool. The packaging was kinda retro and fun, and the website describes the Berry + Mint flavor as, and I quote: “a gateway gum to Unbelievablesville”, so, I was so ready to get down with this stuff. But then I opened the package and saw a very strange, purple-hued gum that can best be described as spongy candy sandpaper.

I imagine the gritty feel of the individual pieces is due to the flavor crystals or some shit, but, seriously, who wants to eat gritty gum? Yikes…

Once I started chewing it, however, I soon realized that the grit was the least of my problems. I mean, the artificial berry flavor up front was fine, and, you know, appropriately artificial tasting, but the truly epic terribleness of this gum was only revealed to me after “the shift”.

My brother described this gum best by calling it “Berry + Aluminum Foil” and, sadly, that is not far off. Tinny, sharp and freakishly metallic tasting, the mint flavor is so weird that you’d swear you lost a filling or something. Blech…coupon or no coupon, I’d say stay as far away as you can from this Stride Shift nastiness.

Oh, and just in case you do happen to keep this crap in your mouth after “the shift”, I should warn you that Stride Shift Berry + Mint completely disintegrates — and sticks to everything in your mouth! — in a little over an hour. Yep, I said disintegrates, like asprin melting on your tongue.

Urgh…just try “shifting” that taste outta your mouth!

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Worst candy ever: Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M’s!

I know what you’re thinking, “Transformer” movie tie-in candy…lame, right? Well, what can I say? I’m a sucker for new spins on old favorites, I love me some Peanut Butter M&M’s and come on, who doesn’t wanna eat something that has been “strawberried”? Yummy!

Man, was I wrong! This is one seriously un-yummy bag of candy, amigos. If I could get my $2.49 back, I totally would. But since I can’t, I figured I’d spread the word about just how bad the idea of “strawberry-ing” anything really is.

Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M's #1

Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M's #2

Christine was (wisely, it turns out!) repulsed by the name alone, but I thought they might taste kinda like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or something. Wrong again! This stomach-churning misfire tastes like someone spilled a big old can of artificial flavoring on your favorite candies and then let it soak in overnight. Blech…truly disgusting stuff.

And while this just might just be the worst candy I’ve ever tasted, I am still dying to know what the hell Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M’s have to do with “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”? Seriously, if anyone out there has seen the movie and knows, please fill me in!

And in the meantime, I say skip the new-fangled M&M’s and head right on down the aisle for some tried and true Mother’s Cookies!

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