“Star Wars: The Force Unleashed”

Breaking my long-standing rule about getting up early, I was second in line at Target on Tuesday morning to purchase the rocking new video game from LucasArts, “Star Wars: The Force Unleashed”.

Now, I know what you’re probably thinking: “Yikes..he’s blogging about “Star Wars” video games now? This dude gets nerdier by the minute…” And yes, I totally do. But that’s beside the point.

I’ve been looking forward to this game since my brother and I first saw, and were blown away by, some of the concept art at the Stars Wars Celebration IV last year. Yes, we went to that too and it rocked! The thing that we loved most about the concept of this game is that it acts as a bridge between the plotlines of the actual movies. Cool, huh?

Set during the time period between “Revenge of the Sith” and “A New Hope”, the game’s central playable character is Darth Vader’s Secret Apprentice who is recruited to the dark side to hunt down and kill any and all remaining Jedi Knights in the galaxy. Wow! It’s like Lucas and company have finally come up with a game that is just as dark and twisted as the movie’s coolest character, Lord Vader himself. Awesome!

And though I was, as I said above, second in line to purchase the game on Tuesday, I am probably the last in line to figure out how to play the damn thing. For though it looks and plays as cool, if not cooler than, some of the movies, this game is f-ing hard, man!

Chapter One begins with you playing Darth Vader — which, if you ask me, is not a bad way to start — and has you charging around Chewbacca’s crazy-cool homeworld of Kashyyyk in search of a rogue Jedi Knight. Sounds easy enough, right? Well, not really.

See, killing the wookies is easy and the force unleashed powers are pretty spectacularly rendered, but once you meet up with that crafty rogue Jedi — who I’m assuming is also the Secret Apprentice you will play as for the rest of the game — things get real hard real fast!

I should say here that I am not a pro gamer by anyone’s standard, and since Christine was off baking cookies while I played, it was just me and my Wii remote flailing and cussing up a storm in the living room. I was getting better by the end, but man, getting that damn Jedi to surrender to the dark side was way harder than it looks on the box, amigos.

So, for now, I’m gonna bone up a bit on the game — who knows, I might actually read the instructions this time! — and try playing again this weekend with a group. Between the four of us eggheads — Ryan, Laura, Christine and myself — we should be able to at least advance to the next level…I hope.

In the meantime, check out the rocking trailer for the game here and if you pick up a copy of “The Force Unleashed” for yourself, please call me and tell me how to play the damn thing! Seriously, I’m dying here…

Return of the Queen: Stephanie Edwards is back, bitches!

As lifelong Tournament of Roses parade geeks — and one time attendees of the actual parade! — Christine and I were thrilled to hear the news today that Stephanie Edwards, the spunky, red-headed ray of sunshine to Bob Eubanks dark cloud, is returning to the job she made famous this year and will be co-hosting the parade from Pasadena on New Year’s Day, 2009! Yay!

For those of you who might have forgotten, fan-favorite Edwards wasn’t just “phased out” by the heartless bastards at KTLA, she was pretty much stoned to death on live TV. Seriously!

First, they decreased her payday by $18,000, then, hoping to sex-up the show with the addition of spicy Latina, Michaela Pereira, they kicked Edwards out of the broadcasting booth and forced her out into the street on the one year it rained cats and freaking dogs in Pasadena. Yep…even God was irked.

But despite the fact that she was dripping wet and clinging mightily to her own umbrella the whole time — they couldn’t have given her a tarp or something? — Edwards kept her cool and worked her parade reporting magic one more time. And you know why? Because that’s what professional bad-asses do, yo!

And instead of rewarding Edwards for her hard work in the pounding rain, KTLA promptly fired her and then had the gall to accuse Edwards of coercing her fans to deluge their offices with hate mail. Um, excuse me? Y’all got hate mail because you screwed up…not because Edwards asked us to send it in…please!

But the good news is that there is a new regime at KTLA who has apparently seen the error in their ways and done everything they can to bring Edwards back into the Rose Parade fold. So, welcome home, Red! New Year’s day can’t come soon enough in our household!

Now, if we could only do something about those embarassingly awful City of Burbank floats we’d be all set…